Reasons People Break Up
If you’re reading this, you probably already have some sort of gut feeling that you and your boo should break it off. Whether it’s because things are getting dull, you want to try something new, or you just aren’t making each other happy anymore, here are some ways to really validate what your heart is trying to tell you.
1He Doesn’t Like Your Friends
If your significant other is constantly making stabs at your friends then it’s time to let this one go! Your true friends have been there for you before you even knew this guy, so why should you let him have any say about who you hang out with? If he truly loved you he would put in the effort to love your friends as much as you do.
2He Isn’t Reliable
Your partner should be someone you can count on. Whether it’s to meet for coffee after your physics class on Tuesdays every week or pick up after himself when he is at your apartment, being able to fully rely and count on your partner is an important part of any relationship.
3He Makes You Feel Bad About Yourself
If you find yourself constantly feeling bad about your actions, personality, or your body because of your partner, then you need to break it off. You should never have to feel torn down or degraded by your lover. Your partner should be lifting you up and making you feel beautiful and unstoppable; Not destroying you piece by piece.
If you’re in a relationship with someone who only thinks about himself, then it is definitely not going to work. Relationships are about teamwork and compromise. One person can’t have it all in a partnership. So, if he is constantly making you change your plans for him, always making you clean up after him, and never ever doing anything selfless and kind for you, then it is definitely time to move on.
5He Doesn’t Prioritize You
He treats his video games and bros like his number one and you’re left alone on a Saturday night scrolling through social media and waiting for him to come over…like he said he would five hours ago. It’s ok if he has other people he enjoys being with and activities he likes to participate in. But, it’s not ok if your boyfriend doesn’t prioritize you too.
6He Won’t Do Things With Your Family
It’s a clear sign that if he doesn’t want to do things with your family and friends that he doesn’t take the relationship very seriously. And, he definitely doesn’t see a future with you. If he did see his life moving forward with yours, he would no doubt put in the effort to make it to family gatherings, get to know your sisters, and even help out in the kitchen. Actions speak louder than words.
Long distance relationships are hard and some couples can make them work. However, if there is no chance of you both ever being in the same state because of differing life goals, then why continue such a painful connection? Sometimes, with distance, you need to make the hard decision to just let go because it’ll benefit both parties.
8He Doesn’t Listen To You
There is nothing more frustrating than being ignored or misunderstood, especially by a partner. You should be with someone who listens to your every thought and actually remembers it. A partner is there to understand you and comfort you in times of need, but how can he do that if he is not actually listening to the words coming out of your mouth?
9There Is No Spark
Sometimes couples start out with a spark and then over the months slowly lose it. Sometimes couples don’t have a spark at the beginning and then build it over time. Sometimes couples just don’t have a spark! But, in order to have a truly satisfying relationship, there must be some sort of sexual chemistry to get your engines running.
10You Can’t Plan With Him
If he won’t talk about the future with you, it can be insanely frustrating. But, even more frustrating is when you can’t even plan a Friday night with him because he is so ‘go with the flow’. If your boyfriend really cared about you, he would be eager to make plans with you because he wants to make sure he gets to spend time with you. He should be excited about the thought of a bowling night or even just a quiet dinner in with you.
Cheating isn’t always black and white. It could be a conversation between two people or full-blown sex. Sometimes, couples can make it through these really sad and terrible situations of infidelity, but sometimes there is just no getting over it. It’s up to you to make them call to decide whether you can move on from an affair or not.
12You Have Clashing Values And Morals
If you and your partner have totally conflicting values, then there might be a problem. Dating someone who is extremely materialistic could create a lot of problems if you are someone who truly values the little things in life. Or, if you value family over friends, and he would much rather party with his bros than attend a family dinner, then that could become an issue. In a relationship, it’s best to have similar morals and core values in order to make everything run smoothly.
13He Doesn’t Put In The Effort
If you have a boyfriend who is just ‘there’, but not really putting in the effort to nurture and grow your relationship, then it’s time to say ‘goodbye’. Relationships where one or both parties put in little to no effort will never work. And, they definitely will not move forward.
14You’re Growing Apart
People change and that means so do relationship dynamics. It’s not always a bad thing to be growing apart from your partner, but it is definitely a sign to look at your relationship and make sure that it’s making you genuinely happy and giving you everything you need to grow as an individual.
15You Argue All The Time
Aruging constantly can be extremely draining and it’s also very toxic to your well-being. It doesn’t matter if they are small back and forth bickering matches or if they are over-the-top end-of-the-world brawls, fighting on a daily basis is not healthy.
16You Dream Of Other People
If you find your mind wandering away from your partner, then maybe it’s time to look at why that’s happening. You may not even be able to find a clearcut answer to the question. Sometimes, when you’re thinking of other people you are just looking for something different, even if the relationship you’re in seems picture perfect. Humans are not always easy to understand, but it is important to go with your gut and take your wandering mind seriously.
17You Just Want To Be Single
Being single is a treat! You don’t have to answer to anyone, you can do what you want, and you have so much time and energy to focus on yourself. It’s good to be single once in a while for personal growth, and if your loved one truly loves you, they will understand this and gently allow you to be free.
18Things Aren’t Moving Forward
Some relationships all of a sudden just come to a stop and there are no moves being made, no making of plans, and nothing to look forward to. That is when it’s time to call it quits. Unless you are genuinely happy hanging out in relationship limbo than I suggest you have ‘the talk’ with your partner to get to the bottom of this relationship stall and decide whether or not it’s worth continuing with.
19It’s Very ‘On And Off Again’
If you are in an ‘on and off’ relationship than it’s time you looked at the very core of the problem. There must be a reason why you keep breaking up and getting back together. And, if you’ve done this many times with your partner, you are probably extremely emotionally exhausted. Once you determine the underlying issues, you’ll be able to decide if the relationship is worth saving or not.
20He Ignores Your Texts And Calls
No girl deserves to be ignored by her boyfriend. It can make you feel unloved, unwanted, and just super sad. If your man really loved you, he wouldn’t want you to feel that way, and he also would be eager to answer you back. Relationships aren’t about game-playing and waiting to text back; those days of ‘trying to win you’ are long over. He has you and he should show you the proper respect. If he doesn’t, say ‘boy, bye’.
21Your Friends Don’t Like Him
No, your friends aren’t always right, but you should definitely take their opinions seriously. If they are constantly telling you they don’t like how your partner treats you, then that is a sure sign that there is something wrong. Sometimes, when you are in a relationship, it’s hard to see the bigger picture. The saying, ‘Love is Blind’ definitely reflects many toxic relationships, so try to be more welcoming of your friend comments.
Nobody likes to be controlled. And, nobody deserves to be controlled either. Love should be a freeing experience, so if your partner is telling you what to do, who to hang out with, or what to wear, then you definitely should reflect on your relationship dynamic and evaluate if you are genuinely free and happy without consequences.
23He Tries To Change You
No one who loves you should ever try to change you! He fell ‘in love’ with you for a reason, so he shouldn’t want to change the way you do your hair, or how you laugh, or how you always google symptoms when you’re sick. He should love all your little quirks and all of your thoughts and opinions, even if he doesn’t always agree. Sacrifice in a relationship is one thing, but trying to change what makes your partner who they are is definitely a no-no.