How to Get a Boy to Like You
How to get a guy to like you? First of all, let us offer the disclaimer that there is no magic way to make a guy like you. There is no snap-your-fingers formula that will let you charm any guy you want (and if anyone possesses such magic, please share), but there are ways to help your chances for sure. Here are twenty five ways to stack the deck and catch your guy’s interest.
1Show him your nerdy side
Do you nerd out over something? Sci-fi movies, astronomy, Dr. Who, even an academic subject? If you’ve got something like that, something you just can’t learn enough about, something you can talk about forever and that excites you, don’t hide it. You may not want to talk his ear off about it, but let him in on it. Let him know you’ve got a brain AND passion.
2Let him take the lead
When you’re getting to know a guy you like, let him take the lead sometimes. We all like to get our way sometimes, and we tend to like when other people are happy to give it to us. Letting him call the shots in the beginning makes you easy company he’ll be happy to have around, so you’ll get to spend more time with him and be in his good graces.
3Leave a little to the imagination
When we like someone, we want to know EVERYTHING. That wanting, that anticipation, is intoxicating, and it really draws us in. So, make it last! Don’t reveal too much in the beginning, so he’ll have something to wonder about.
4Show him your sense of humor
How to make a guy like you? Be fun, be silly, crack jokes, do whatever it is that makes you laugh. Don’t you love when a guy makes you laugh? They like it in a girl, too! The point isn’t to do a stand-up routine to score points, but to let go and let your own sense of humor shine.
5Talk to his friends
“If you wanna be my lover, you gotta get with my friends.” – Ancient Greek proverb or maybe just Spice Girls lyrics. It’s accurate either way. If his friends are around, engage them, too. Being too focused on him alone can be uncomfortable when there are other people around. Striking up conversation with his friends also shows that you’re social and friendly and would fit right in with his group.
6Show your quirks
If you want to know how to get your crush to like you, know that little details can be so special and adorable. Sometimes it’s the tiniest thing that hooks someone- like that special request you always make when you order your drink at Starbucks, or the silly phrase you picked up long ago and now can’t stop saying, or how you always have like twelve ponytail holders on your wrist even though you’d never need all of them and you know it’s crazy- because it’s so specific to one person. Don’t be shy with your quirks, because you never know which of them might turn out to be the cutest thing about you.
People like to talk about themselves, so don’t just let him do that: encourage it, and take an interest. Ask him open-ended questions about his hobbies, interests, studies, and thoughts. You get to learn more about your crush in the process, and he’ll enjoy the chance to share.
Remember what he tells you when you ask him questions about himself, and if you get the chance, bring it up again. Don’t force this, however– you don’t want to seem obsessive. If he said something last week that struck you as interesting or got you thinking or browsing Wikipedia to learn more, let him know. It shows that you listen and engage, and that you’re sharp, too.
9Find common ground
If you discover that you have something major in common- you both play music, you love the same sport or team- you’ve got the perfect in. You’ve got something to talk about and something to do together that fits both of you. Think about it: if he’s starting to like you, too, he’ll be able to imagine you by his side when he’s watching basketball or playing his instrument. Ding ding ding!
How to get out of the friend zone? You can be a little bold. You can flirt. You can put it out there. The trick is to be confident. If you’re confident and casual and forward when you pay him a compliment or hint that you’re digging him, he’ll catch your drift but won’t feel put on the spot. If you’re shy about it, you simultaneously make yourself vulnerable and put pressure on him to respond in a certain way.
11Don’t take yourself too seriously
Loosen up! Laugh at yourself, welcome the occasional harmless joke at your expense, don’t get super hung up on your hair or your outfit or your makeup when you’re around him. When you’re uptight, people- including the guy you like- don’t know how to approach you, and might just avoid doing it instead. This is the opposite of what you want.
12Let him show you his favorite thing
Our first tip was to show him your nerdy side, and you should also let him show you his nerdy side. Don’t you love it when someone lets you gush about your favorite book or TV show and actually listens? Let him nerd out to you. Even if you don’t totally get it, if you humor him and try, the effort will be appreciated.
13Let him teach you something
People like to be right, and they like to feel smart and useful. Guys dig this kind of ego boost, so let him show you how to change a tire or explain his theory on that book you both read for your humanities class. Don’t worry that letting him have his moment will make you seem helpless or dumb. You’ve got plenty of opportunity to let yourself and your skills, personality, and brain shine…just give him a little something, even if you already know how to change a tire.
14Light physical contact
To pull this off, it has to be super chill and casual, like it’s absolutely nothing to you. A quick, playful touch of your hand on his arm, shoulder, back, or knee will make you look ultra confident and sure of yourself, and, if he’s starting to like you, too, it’ll make him want more.
Yes, it’s good to let him take charge sometimes, but if he asks you what you think about something or what you want to do, give a solid, honest answer. Nothing is more disappointing than putting a question or idea before someone and getting, “Oh, I don’t know,” in response. And if you feel like asking him out for coffee, do it, plainly and directly: “Hey, do you want to have coffee after chemistry on Thursday?” This comes back to confidence again, and while guys often like to be in control, they’re happy to go along with a solid plan, too.
16Show your feminine side
How to make him want you? There’s something to be said for acting the part of “just one of the guys,” but let us remind you of something: you want him to like you, not just think of you as one of his bros. You can and should let your girly side show. A guy may not want to go shopping with you or hear about your makeup routine, but, assuming he’s straight, he isn’t interested in dating someone who might as well be another guy. So be a girl, in whatever way is authentic to you.
17Let him be the tough guy
We keep coming back to ways to boost his ego, because this stuff WORKS. If being around you makes him feel like a tough guy, really masculine, he’ll like being around you. So if he wants to carry something for you or open doors or fix something in your car or apartment, let him do it, and be gracious.
As the saying goes, the way to a man’s heart is through his stomach. If you have the chance to bring him food (because he’s stuck at work, or cramming for a final exam at the library), you have a golden opportunity.
19Don’t trash your exes
Even if your ex really was the worst guy ever, even if it drives you crazy to think about how you put up with him, don’t bring it up around your crush. It’s not a fun conversation to have, it benefits no one, and- though there’s nothing wrong with still hurting over an old relationship- the guy you hope you be dating next is the worst audience for it. He doesn’t know your ex, so all he’s hearing is the way you talk about guys who you’ve fallen out with.
20Don’t trash other girls
We hope you don’t do this anyway, but if you need another reason not to do it, newsflash: it does you no favors with guys. It might make you sound insecure, bitter, and generally nasty. You don’t make a good case for yourself by arguing that other girls are inferior. And by the way, if you do trash other girls and he’s happy to join in, he’s not the type of guy you want to date.
21Don’t trash yourself
A little self-aware shot at yourself is one thing, but don’t make your insecurities a topic of discussion. You’ll come off as fishing for compliments, or insecure, or high-maintenance, and none of this is cute. In short, if you continually talk about how awful you are, he’s not going to be determined to convince you otherwise: he’ll believe you.
22Give him time to miss you
How many times have you spent a couple of days just dying for the chance to say your crush’s name or bring him up in conversation, checking your phone every three seconds to see if he has texted you yet? No shame– we’ve all done that. And wouldn’t it be great to make a guy that crazy with anticipation? Of course it would! So if you think you’re beginning to pique his interest, give him a little time and space so he’ll wonder about you, and then be eager to hear from you.
23Laugh at his jokes
This is an age old tip, and we still hear it because it works. Try to sincerely appreciate his humor, or at the very least his effort. Besides, you’re cute when you’e laughing.
When a guy smells good, don’t you get a little weak in the knees? It goes both ways. Engage his senses by using a light perfume or a shampoo with a unique scent. Just before you part, let your hair down so he catches a quick whiff of that intoxicating aroma.
We swear we’re not being cheesy when we say it’s important to be yourself. You’re great just as you are, and of course the temptation to show a crush only your best or whatever he wants to see is understandable. But you don’t want to and can’t do it forever, and what’s more, it will show if you’re being fake. He’ll see right through it and be totally turned off.