How to Get a Boy to Ask You Out


Best Ways to Get a Guy to Ask You out

Traditionally speaking, guys ask girls out and not the other way around. Although girls are technically completely capable of asking a boy on a date, asking someone out is nerve wrecking so we girls tend to prefer to let the guy deal with the uncomfortable stuff! While we totally admire girls who are bold enough to initiate the dating process, we know that most girls are more comfortable waiting for him to make the first move which is why we have created this list of ways to get a boy to ask you out. On this list you will find two categories of tips: First, we will give you some general advice that applies to any scenario that falls somewhere on the crush spectrum, from liking him from a distance to crushing on your best guy friend. Second, we will provide targeted tips for you depending on whether you know him really well or don’t hang out with him that much (yet!). Remember, even though he is the one asking you out, there is still work to do on your end to increase the odds of it happening—and ensure that another girl doesn’t catch his eye first!

Tips For: No Matter How Well You Know Him;
When He’s Your Close (or Best!) Friend; Or
For When You’re Crushing From Afar

1Make an effort with your appearance

Although decent guys look for girls who have more than just an attractive appearance, it is totally natural and not superficial for him to care about how a girl looks. Considering this, making an effort to look your best is a great way to get him to notice you. You don’t need to start wearing a ton of makeup or clothes that you aren’t comfortable in, just make sure that you are well groomed, that you accentuate your best features, and that you feel that you look your best. Confidence is magnetic so he is more likely to see you in the way that you want him to if you feel awesome about yourself.

2Smile more

Sure, models in magazines look great when they look angsty or aloof, but that doesn’t mean these are expressions you should replicate when you want a guy to ask you out. Models have the benefit of airbrushing and also aren’t channeling their smoldering expressions for the purpose of enticing their crush to ask them out. Countless studies show that men are more interested in dating women who smile a lot and look like they are having fun. Why? Because the whole point of dating is to find someone you can have fun with, not just someone who looks abnormally pretty when they’re angry! Plus, in addition to showing him how fun you are, smiles make you look extra beautiful since your whole face lights up!

3Treat him differently than other guys

Even if you have a crush on a guy who you don’t really know or come into contact with often, you can send him signals that make him feel special. For example, if you walk by him and his friend, smile flirtatiously at him, but only politely at his friend. Though you should treat him as if he is special, be sure to avoid being rude to other people in the process. If you’re super nice to him and rude to other guys, he may realize you have a crush but he won’t be inclined to ask you out since you won’t seem like a nice person.

4Hang out where he hangs out

The key to getting him to notice you is obvious: be visible! Maybe you noticed a cute guy at work and are dying to have him ask you out, but you aren’t sure if he has also noticed you Take note of where he likes to spend time or even the people he hangs out with. The more he sees you or hears his friends mention you, the more he will consciously (or unconsciously) think about you. While noticing your existence is a far cry from asking you out on a date, it is the first step!

5Strike up conversation

It can be hard to muster up the courage to start a conversation, but it doesn’t need to be as scary as it feels. Even though your crush is like a celebrity in your mind, he’s also just a normal guy who has conversations with people. In the same way that you wouldn’t think it was weird if someone you didn’t know struck up a conversation with you, he won’t think it’s weird if you do. He will think it’s weird if you turn bright red and squeak every time he’s around you, so just relax and play it cool. You can say anything to get a conversation going, even if it’s something about the weather. Striking up conversation with him will create a memory so you the opportunity to make a good and intriguing impression. Don’t over think your interaction, but it doesn’t hurt to come up with a few witty and memorable opening lines!

6Demonstrate your interest by finding excuses to get in touch

After you’ve established that he knows who you are and that he is as friendly as you hoped, you can reach out to your crush without feeling like it is weird. You want to send signals to him that you are making an effort to get to know him, but you don’t need to be overly flirty in order to get him interested in asking you out. If you are getting in touch for plausibly legitimate reasons, you don’t have to worry about the embarrassing possibility that you could flirt really hard and he would deny your advances. If he is physically attracted to you and/or blown away by how fun and interesting you are, he will be inclined to ask out if he notices that you are going out of your way to talk to him. A guy is much more likely to ask a girl out if he thinks she won’t reject him!

7Ask his friends for advice

This tip is only useful if you are brave enough to admit to his friends that you like him. Asking his friends for advice about how to get his attention is useful because every guy is different and they are the only ones who know the specific things you can do to increase the odds that he asks you out!

8Make sure he knows you don’t want to be single anymore

When you’re good friends with a guy, sometimes it can be uncomfortable to broach the subject of romance at all, since part of how boy-girl friendships function is the assumption that each of you thinks of each other platonically. Often, guys try to think of their girl friends as “one of the guys” in order to avoid being tempted to complicate the friendship. But, if you like your guy friend, you want to complicate things! It sounds silly, but you need to make an effort to remind him that you are a girl and that you have romantic needs too! You need to break down the barriers that he has put in place to avoid thinking of you as a potential romantic partner.

9Make it clear that you do not think it is weird for friends to date each other

Even if he secretly likes you too, he has probably worried about how turning a friendship into a romantic relationship will change things, or even ruin the important friendship that you do have. If he knows that you don’t see a problem with friends dating, he will be more open to the idea that asking you out may not actually be the craziest thing!

10Make extended flirty eye contact

Obviously you are used to making eye contact with him since he’s your good friend and you talk all the time. However, you can still use your eyes as a strategic tool to make him interested in asking you out! Make an effort to look at him a little bit longer than usual and in a flirtier way. He may be caught off guard by how you have begun to look at him differently, but this is a good thing! Your goal is to remind him that the possibility of you two dating isn’t a ridiculous idea, so you need to send subtle hints that you don’t necessarily think of him as just a friend.

11Figure out how to get alone with him in situations typical for couples

They key to getting him to ask you out when he is your close friend is making him confront the reality that the two of you dating is completely plausible. If you go out to dinner just the two of you, choose a romantic restaurant. More than likely, your waiter will make some sort of allusion to the fact that you two are a couple. Even though you aren’t actually a couple (yet!), you want him to encounter the message that you two could be a couple, as often as possible. You need to chip away at all of the reasons that he keeps you in the box of “just friends,” so putting yourself in situations that are typical for couples will help to make him think about the idea of you as a potential romantic partner.

Wouldn’t it be great if anytime you liked a guy, he would just ask you out right away? Even though this would be a lot easier, there are a lot of ways you can increase the odds that he will eventually ask you out. This list has touched on a few strategies you can try out, but there are many other things you can do as well. Remember, regardless of whether you are crushing from a distance or crushing on your best friend, you ultimately want to do things that simultaneously make you attractive to him and also convince him that he will not be rejected. We hope you have found this list helpful, and don’t forget to check out our other articles for more tips about crushes and relationships!


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